For my Own Children

When people first came to this country, one of their biggest goals was the allowance of progress. More specifically, they wanted to do better than their parents. In the Old Country, a man may do no better than his father. As outlined in A Tree Grows in Brooklyn: "Provided he works hard...he may rise, but only to his father's state." But here, there was the possibility of endless possibilities. There were no limits. It was a new beginning, the chance to do whatever you were capable of regardless of what your parents were.

Fast forward a few generations. One of the biggest fears is becoming like your parents. Let alone occupation, sons and daughters vow never to be even close to what their parents have become behavior and personality wise. This, to me, is... it's ridiculous. I've observed my parents. I've watched them try their hardest to raise me and three after me. Not only raise us, but bring us up in an environment free of danger, of fear, of rape and horrific discovery and too much junk food. You can never imagine what being a parent means. I have no idea myself.

It must be Hell. To keep your baby safe in a world like ours today. You turn on the news and hear of families burning alive in their own apartments, and soldiers being held hostage with a baby on the way back home. Of children being abandoned and abused. It must be torture to succeed in teaching them love when they are surrounded on all sides by hate. I've seen it go wrong, you've seen it go wrong. You've seen kids who think they have punch smaller kids in the mouth because they are beaten at home every day. You see the kids fighting for attention because their parents ignore them. Ignore them. You've seen the kids who badmouth and abuse their mothers, who are in false control and will therefore never be able to thrive once they move out. I have no idea how fucking lucky I am.

I want to be exactly like my parents when I grow up. I want to be no different. I don't know if I can even come close to how beautifully they've done. And four different times? I'm surprised they didn't up and leave. I could never express my gratitude and amazement of how much they gave us, how much they gave up for us. I want that for my own children. And for their children. I want that.